WHY ME?

"Why me" - a spontaneous evolving reaction by a man in vivid situations.i will  portray some of the situations here:
you confront  the toughest of the situations in your life ; go through continuous agony and depression ,you ask " why me".

you have  misfortunes ; a series of failure and don't achieve what was desired for,you ask "why me?"

you want to skip your turn in an assigned deed and you have your turn, then u naturally ask" why  me?"

you want the things going right  and you end up messing them, then you ask "why only me"?

 you have things set in the  right direction  and are flawless and  still are blamed  and targeted,then you obviously ask "why the hell only me ?"

one day you have your fortune's call ,and you are elated  ,then also u ask "why on earth was it  me"!

why does my child throw things?

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A child's mind is a complex  riddle and is extremely difficult to solve. Child has a wide array of behavior patterns at each phase of its life and as parents its challenging to mold them. Every parent would have experienced one or the other behavioral abnormalities; one among them would be throwing stuffs around. A child grows through different physical, intellectual, social and emotional developmental stages , during its growth.


In the toddler stage (2 to 3years) child is its own boss and is in the “terrible tantrum” phase. A child’s intellectual ability is just budding, it is just learning to speak in full sentences and in turn child may not be able to express his /her needs to the adequate level and in turn may express discomfort/needs by showing this type of behavior. In this phase child may the throw a lot of temper tantrums and this method of throwing things may be a way to show their anger/ frustration when they do not acquire what they needed or are dissatisfied. It seems like they get some sort of gratification by doing this act. They may be lacking the   attention what they are craving for. So by doing this, it is likely that they   attract the attention of their parents who may be engaged with their activities. Also, a child at this stage explores and acquires a lot of things and habits. So the child has fun by throwing everything what comes on its way –may it be a soft ball, a toy or a utensil, crockery or glass object. So as parents we need to guide them and help them distinguish the difference between a play object and a valuable /dangerous object.

Even as the child grows up and reaches the preschool stage, they may be persistent with this behavior. This may be a consequence to the parents  over pampering. Without even realizing the fact, we may be ignoring our child’s flaws  and not guide them to the right track. A little bit of authority over your child’s behavior is acceptable; we need to incorporate some discipline in the child. Striking a balance between love and discipline is desired; do not let your love and empathy rule over your child’s behavior. They acquire a lot of intellectual capability by this age. So training them is important and making them realize about their bad mannerisms is necessary.

Some kids may have this problem of throwing things along with lot of other behavioral abnormalities and may even continue this into their school age. If the kids are too impulsive, restless and  aggressive and do not have a control over their actions, is not following your talk or grasping or responding to your commands, then it may be due to an associated developmental /medical condition –it could be ADHD OR ADD; AUTISM, ASPERGER’S SYNDROME; HEARING IMPAIREDNESS OR SOME OTHER SORT OF DEVELOPEMENTAL DELAYS, and your child may need assistance of a developmental and behavioral specialist or a pediatric psychiatrist.

WHY DOESN'T MY CHILD EAT?

This is a very common preferred topic of choice for discussion by most of the parents. Most of the kids almost three fourth the population of kids could be considered “fussy eaters “ ,if we don’t really try to tackle this issue.!

• Kids naturally aren’t bad eaters. They aren’t really inborn to be fussy eaters! There are so many factors which consequentially makes them so. “As the seeds you sow, so the fruits you reap “so why not start at the beginning? When the child is just out of the breast feeding stage and begins its first food we can try molding them and customizing them to our needs, which in turn are their needs also, so that we avoid the forthcoming obstacles to feeding. Starting off with the food that meets your expectations and are going to be a part of the child’s regular diet hence forth(like some fruits ,vegetables ,rice. Dry fruits, soups, fruit juices, etc) is a great idea. Initially you may face difficulties (there may be a few vomiting, burping, spitting episodes) but it’s pretty much normal and the child naturally overcomes all these. Start only with little and slowly raise it to the level of their appetite. You have a vague idea of how much your child needs, so make it a point that you feed them the necessary quantity. So by this we are gradually conditioning the child to a particular diet.

• This is the first stage. If you have crossed this stage and your child is at the next stage (toddler or a kindergarten) and child creates fuss and nuisance for eating, running around the entire house yelling and resisting ,then its time for your action. You need to draw a line and judge if your child is really not hungry or is just trying to avoid the food just because he doesn’t like it , and can get rid of it by all these tantrums!

• If your child isn’t really hungry then there’s no point just blaming the kid. The point is child would have been overfilled with other snacks or junk food; had in between and there wouldn’t be any scope for more filling. So give him/her some space, let it relax and then feed them when they demand for it! Let the child be damn hungry; as simple as it is.

• But this isn’t the right practice though, and so my sincere suggestion would be to avoid giving them those stuffs and keep them to reinforce after their meal. Also reinforcing the child by giving his favortie toy/letting him go out to play /watching his favorite tv shows, etc works well.

• If the child is trying to avoid the food then there may be several reasons, the most common being that the child isn’t finding the food interesting or tasty.  Decorate the food or present it to the child in an interesting manner.So you can add on some sausages, flavors of their choice; make veggies unnoticeable by mixing them with some favorite food of theirs like a pasta or sandwich or a burger; grind the vegetable into a fine paste and mix with a pasta or rice so that it becomes a nice flavor to enjoy; vegetable soups are another option; if your child resists drinking milk ,then switch to cheese or yoghurt ,which are equally rich in vitamins and calcium; fruits could be blended with cream, fruit smoothies are another option; so you can go on .. try out different crazy things !

• Kids act fussy also at times seeking their parent’s attention. We may be busy with our own tasks, and unnoticeably we may not be paying attention to them .so try being with them or feeding them as an option during their lunch time.

• Some kids may avoid food as sequel to overanxious mothers trying to overfeed beyond limits, or pressurizing them to eat food. So as a consequence, the kid’s plea away by the sight of food. Make eating a casual, pleasure full experience. Each Childs appetite and limits may vary, keep this in mind!

• Some of the overpamperd kids may throw tantrums and be adamant in eating food by trying this as a strategy. So we need to just ignore this and try being a little firm in those cases.

• They may be focused in doing some other task and literally feel this eating task a boring thing to do. So I think discipline is the factor which plays its role in such cases. They need to have proper schedule right from the beginning and make it a point for them to finish their meal and then proceed with their activities may it be playing, or watching their favorite TV shows, etc.

• One of the least possible reasons is a person’s characteristic to eat less and his nature which is very hard to change and most parents claim this reason to be their prime one!