Friday, October 15, 2010

"Dramatic teen"...why so weird???

We all have experienced the nostalgic childhood days with different memories for each one of us.But of all those years ,i feel my teenage(especially 12 to 15) was the most dramatic one in  life with so many vivid thoughts and imaginations.As a gal hailing from a traditional Brahman family (though grown in a city),I was prohibited from hanging around with friends after school ,movies ,late night returns to home,etc.It was home to school and back to home.But the time in between at school used to be fun.I had one friend who was very dear to me and we used to hang out together even though it used to be during school hours or during our dance/music classes after school.We used to discuss so many fascinating topics for teenagers , have fun in our own way by throwing our lunch boxes and having a banana leaf served meal for lunch at our favorite restaurant at Mangalore.(i forgot the name)and also the "ragada patiese"a famous chat served at a small chat corner.And my finance was from my pocket money and if that fell short,then it used to be stolen money from my mom's purse.
                  My friend and me had strange attractions towards the opposite sex then ,her choice of guys kept changing ,once it was this guy from our boys school guy who used to play flute (she was crazy for flutes),and then it was the restaurant  guy ,who was fair,charming and  was"blue eyed",which mesmerised her.Even i had one crush at those times ,a paint shop cashier!oh my...I remember ,everyday when i used to travel on my dad's motorcycle on the way to school ,we used to exchange a unexplainable look : it seemed as if our eyes exchanged a lot of thoughts and words.
         We also had these bizarre thoughts crossing our minds about the "world end"which was assumed to be in 2000 and had our own" forecasts ", imagined the sequel later .My friend even had this idea of eloping with the restaurant guy on the last day of the world if both survived.There was one more drama sequence which we had imagined in our real lives:this happened when i was annoyed and hurt for some matter by my parents .We thought of being "free birds" just eloping away ,and having our own lives and not relying on our parents for anything ,depending on each other and being friends forever. But then the question arouse"what if one among us fell in love ?"Then we had to be in a contract as to not get married!because things would change if one of us get married.We imagined and floated in our self created "fantasy world".Now after so many years ,when i rewind and picture those days ,i feel ..why was i so weird then?I know this is pretty much common to most of us and everyone have a story to share ,don't you?

19 comments:

Meri said...

Sounds like pretty regular teen-age stuff, with lots of crushes and romantic fantasies. The problem develops if the fantasies continue in adulthood when reality should have taken over. (Nice to meet you!)

SG said...

Nice post. Enjoyed reading. We are 6 boys and no girl. (My daughter is the first born girl in our family in the past 75 years.)

The strange thing is the "strict rules" are enforced by the parents only on girls and not on boys.

Interesting narration about the crushes. Just curious. What is your friend doing now?

dr.antony said...

When I was young, I was convinced I was going to marry Jayalalitha or Asha Parekh.That was the type of crush then.

It didn't matter to me that they were about ten to 20 years older
than I was, nor did it cross my mind I would probably never meet either of them. It took me until I was an older teen to realize this would never happen.
The crush that teenage girls seem to get like changing their clothes usually will disappear when the boy just doesnt live up to their expectations. Or because their friends just dont like them.
Teenage girls are very emotional people. Often,these crushes usually do not turn out very well.
Sometimes,they enter in to intense relationships with same sex.There are many many stories of such girls deciding to end their lives,when they realize they can not live together.
It is an age at which a girl can be easily mis led.The times are not like before.With more freedom than ever,they go out or even can spend time with friends of their choice,without their family knowing.It is growing stories of teenage sex and relationships in my place these days.
I am worried about the present day teens.They lack the innocence which we used to see in them.It is as if,minds are getting corrupt earlier than our times.They need constant attention and care and emotional support from their parents.May be,the only solution.

anupama said...

hey! i really felt nostalgic reading this post ha ha.. the name of the restaurant was Hotel AYODHYA. we also had devised a unique technique to communicate when the teacher was in the class, the GREAT CODE language hehehehe our rough books were full of those codes!!!

i think we are still dreamers and the world within us is keeping us going........... :)Thanks RAJI

raji said...

@ MERI thanks for your comments.true as we mature we need to overcome these fantasies and live in the world of reality.nice to know you too.

raji said...

@SG ,oh nice to knpw that ur daughter is a gal into ur family after 75 years.True ,but these "strict "rules are a part of ur culture,and their only intention finally was that they wanted the gals to be secure .But I personally feel that gals too deserve thier liberty and they can just be advised for their limitations.And yes for your question,my friend is still around and we still share our fantasies.we are friends since 18years.She has replied here,u can check out.

raji said...

@ dr anthony,absolutely true .what i shared was the 1994 story.now after 16 years i can relate the generation today and the "crush"concept may not exist these days.Everything would be "physical"these days.Those days it was different ,it was just a sort of attraction and nothing else;atleast in my friend circle.But now it seems different ;truely said.Thanks doctor.

raji said...

@ anu,yes anu "ayodhya"now i remember.and the code name we kept for the blue eyed guy "Farangipete mari"that was truely fuuny.for readers ,this "fm"was named so because the first name was the place he hailed from and the second name was just a slang word which meant "nomad":)

Amrit said...

@Raji,

Thanks for posting. It is insight that a dad would not know otherwise. Now I know what to expect...sometimes in near future.

I think your parents did a great job in upbringing you. :) Whatever you say about not allowing late night movies, parties etc.

raji said...

@ A i feel this is just a immature stage ,where mind wanders and is not under control;every person will overcome this as time flows.The culture what we incorporate to our child definetely remains..Seems like u r very much apprehensive about ur child.how old is she now?

Rama Ananth said...

Hi Raji,
Good to hear about bygone days. You are right, when we think of it now, we thank our stars for not being stupid enough to have acted on any of them.
At that age we felt we knew everything, and we were so upset by the rules and regulations set by parents.
But now we realise when we ourselves have had grown up children, how difficult the whole situation is and we can empathise with our parents.

raji said...

@ RAMA .yes tht's true .

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Oh yes---very dramatic years.... We all go through the teen years --and for those of us who raised kids, we went through it with THEM.....

It's an important time since kids are forming their own beliefs and thoughts about life. We try things which our parents don't know about... We make BAD decisions --but hopefully many good decisions also. We find 'love' for the first time--and those fluttery feelings... It's a hard time....

My advice to parents: Good Communication and Understanding and Patience....

Thanks for coming to my blog.
Hugs,
Betsy

raji said...

yes very true betsy .thanks for ur comments.

Abhilash Pillai said...

Wow! Raji. That was a classic article. You touched the heart. The post was frank and completely true in all aspects. People normally do not expose such things before the public and especially the women. All have such stories some way or the other. In other words, all are crazy in some part of their life.

I was also mad after some Gi** however I recovered from the mental illness very soon. Hope my immune system was better to cope us with such craziness. : )

Nice to see someone writing as per my expectations. Hey! For your knowledge, I am still that crazy type of guy. I have not changed yet and neither my friends I suppose. : )

raji said...

hm..abhilash thanks for ur comments.true i know people donot usually expose themselves ,but i dont mind..and as u said its pretty much common for crazy people like us to have such crazy thoughts.:)

Bikramjit Singh Mann said...

Your last pact with your friend reminds me , what we had hilarious time, a group of guys was like we will be togehter no matter what, but alas the cruel life has taken us all into different directions


Brought bakc so many memories wonder where that PAINT shop guy would be now , did you try to find out he he he :)

ahhh good old days hainnnnnnnn wonder how we can get them back :)


Bikram's blog

Emily, Ruby Slipper Journeys said...

Teenage years are always a bit dramatic... I'm glad they are past!

raji said...

@ bikram ,the paint shop guy is still there .when i visit mangalore and i travel through tht road ,i just peek in to see ,i can still find him sitiing there.hehe.and i just laugh at myself!